Dec 102015
 

Antonio Brown Celebrates (1)

And I thought lap dances at Blush were expensive…

Pittsburgh Steelers wide receiver Antonio Brown was fined $12,000 for his post humping celebration during Sunday’s win over the Colts. $11,576 to be exact. Or, as AB called it, “a little fine.” Man, it must be awesome to be so rich you can afford to blow twelve grand making an idiot of yourself on national TV.

The NFL’s fine system factors in multiple violations and is calculated as a percentage of your game check. So the $12,000 number likely indicates he’s been fined before. Unlike earlier in the year when the league fined Cam Heyward for the terrible sin of honoring his late father who died of cancer during Cancer Awareness Month, I have no problem with this one. If Brown wants to waste his money foolishly, more power to him.

I know, I know, some people will say the “No Fun League” strikes again. Honestly, I hate post-touchdown celebrations. Even “normal” ones where a guy does a little dance or whatever and there’s no chance of injury strike annoy me. AB, however, has twice now done something crazy – first the back-flip into the end zone, then the Wile E. Coyote – and it would be pretty unforgivable if he were to injure himself one of of these. Mike Tomlin really needs to sack up and put a stop to it before the worst happens.

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Nov 252015
 

ytytytyt

When the story of the 2015 NFL season is written, there will a number of narratives. The excellence of the Patriots and the sudden emergence of the Panthers. Peyton Manning finally tapping out to Father Time. The huge gape in parity between the league’s elite teams and the ones struggling to get above .500.

However, the overriding story of the 2015 NFL season will be how it’s been marred by major injuries to a host of star players. NFL 2015 – the Season of Crippling Injuries.

Of course, we don’t have to tell fans of the Black and Gold. I’ve been watching the Pittsburgh Steelers since the late 80s and I’ve never seen a year remotely like this. Every year you lose guys but never at the level or rate we’ve lost them this season. It’s to the point every game I expect another shoe to drop. Continue reading »

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Sep 032015
 

1380875521316632495

Can the preseason end now? Please?

The Preseason From Hell continued this afternoon when word came down that a federal court judge threw out Roger Goodell‘s four game suspension of New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady for his role in Deflategate. Because of course he did. Did anybody really think Darth Belichick would let his apprentice get punished for his wrongdoing? Never underestimate the power of the Dark Side.

And now the Pittsburgh Steelers will witness the firepower of a fully armed and operational Patriots offense. Continue reading »

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May 122015
 

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Dear Roger Goodell:

I know we’ve had our differences. Sure the Pittsburgh Steelers were the only team to vote against the current CBA because they thought you had too much power. Sure James Harrison called you an asshole in a magazine interview and said he has zero respect for you after you fined him a billion times for playing football. Sure Steeler Nation finds you a despicable despot who lets a wifebeater like Ray Rice go with a slap on the wrist while throwing the book at Ben Roethlisberger despite him never being charged with a single offense. But that’s all water under the Clemente Bridge.

You did us a solid. A real solid. And we appreciate it buddy!

Tom Brady is the Golden Boy of the NFL. The New England Patriots are the showcase team of the past decade plus. Never mind the fact they cheated to win at least one of their Super Bowls thanks to illegally videotaping their opponents. The Steelers were dicked over in one of those games and even after you gave them a token “punishment” and destroyed the tapes, we never forgot. When the Pats were caught using illegally deflated balls in this year’s AFC Championship Game, we figured you’d hand out another of your laughable punishments and call it a day.

Well, color me shocked when I heard that Tom Terrific was suspended the first four games of the 2015 NFL season in addition to the team losing next year’s first round draft pick. The pick is whatever but looking at the schedule, why, it appears the Steelers play the Patriots on Kickoff Thursday week one! Even if the suspension is commuted down to a game or two, he’s not going to be in the line-up to abuse our pitiful secondary which is, uh, good. Really really good.

So thanks, Ginger Dick, er, Mr. Goodell. I knew after all that time spent at Washington & Jefferson you couldn’t possibly hate the Steelers as much as the first nine years of your administration seemed to suggest. You finally did something to benefit the Black and Gold! Like the saying goes, better late than never!

Sincerely,
Chris
TotalSteelers

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Apr 102015
 

bell bengals

The wheels of NFL justice may not move swift but at least they always get it right.

Wait, what? Three games? What the fu…

Pittsburgh Steelers running back Le’Veon Bell has been suspended for 3 games for the DWI drug arrest last August. Or one game more than Ray Rice was originally suspended for cold-cocking his fiancee back when he pleaded guilty to assault after the first tape surfaced. Graphically beating a woman = two games. Getting pulled over while smoking joints = three games.

Yep, that Roger Goodell sure knows how to make the tough decisions lemme tell ya.

Idiocy from the office of the Ginger Dictator aside, Bell certainly deserves some punishment if only for abject stupidity. He’s appealing his suspension which leads me to believe they’ll knock it down to two games in order to appear “fair.” Considering the Steelers defense is currently bowling shoe ugly with real potential to be the worst in the league – not yinzer hyperbole, go through position by position, it’s garbage – the only realistic shot they have to win games next year is to score early and score often for which they’ll need the best all-around running back in the league. Newly signed DeAngelo Williams should be serviceable enough in a pinch but he’s no Bell.

Hopefully Bell’s absence doesn’t cost his team too dearly although after watching last year’s Wild Card game, to say this is a different offense without him in the line-up would be a colossal understatement.

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Sep 102014
 

The Blind Eye Ray Rice

If you’re reading a football blog – particularly one dedicated to the Pittsburgh Steelers – chances are you’ve heard plenty about the Ray Rice fiasco the past couple days. The fact Rice has had his career nuked due to his reprehensible actions doesn’t interest me. Maybe some day he’ll be welcomed back by the Baltimore Ravens – perhaps they’ll even erect a freakin’ statue in his honor like they did for the murderous thug who played linebacker for them –  as nobody really expects better from a low class organization like the Ratbirds. But for now Rice is simply a lowlife scumbag who got exactly what he deserved.

What does interest me about the Ray Rice fiasco is the number of eyes it opened to the corrupt administration of NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. In recent days, everybody from Keith Olbermann to former governor Ed Rendell have called for Goodell to resign. And those who haven’t gone quite that far are still taking Goodell to task for his absolutely inept handling of the entire situation. Nobody has to tell Steeler Nation, though, as we’re a fanbase that has long been familiar with the slimy little weasel who sits in the commissioner’s office. Continue reading »

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Mar 212014
 

Wild Card Playoffs - Pittsburgh Steelers v Denver Broncos

Eight.

That’s the total number of receptions made by wide receivers not named Antonio Brown remaining on the Pittsburgh Steelers roster. Maybe – I stress the word maybe – they improved their defense this off-season. They for damn sure didn’t improve their offense. In fact, it’s hard to look at the current depth chart and argue it’s gotten anything but significantly worse.

Jerricho Cotchery is the latest to depart, reportedly agreeing to a two year $6 million deal with the Carolina Panthers. The Cotch Rocket had a career year in 2013,  catching 45 passes for 602 yards and a team leading 10 touchdowns. Unlike Mike Wallace and Emmanuel Sanders, the Black and Gold actually wanted to re-sign Cotchery, who provided a dependable veteran presence to the passing game. With the Steelers down to only $2 million in salary cap space – they have to wait until June 1st for nearly $8 million of LaMarr Woodley‘s money to clear – it appears Cotchery wasn’t willing to wait and see what the Steelers planned to offer. Continue reading »

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Dec 192013
 

kevin-huber

When I was a kid, I wrote letters to Santa. Times really have changed. What that young Bengals fan doesn’t realize – besides the fact he’s in for a lifetime of disappointment – is that success is the best revenge.

Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker Terence Garvin was slapped with a $25,000 fine for destroying Cincinnati Bengals punter Kevin Huber last Sunday night. C’mon, you didn’t really think Roger Goodell was going to let a Steeler get away with laying somebody out on national TV, did you? With a defense full of pansies and lousy tacklers, the Ginger Dictator has had precious few opportunities to indulge his favorite hobby of fining Steelers for playing football this season. His catered lunch slush fund must be dwindling dangerously low. Continue reading »

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Dec 052013
 

Tomlin smirking tripping

Nearly a week since Pittsburgh Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin executed the Two Step Heard ‘Round The World, Steeler Nation has been bracing for the inevitable consequences. Yesterday, NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell finally deigned to step down from Mount Olympus and pass down punishment for The Blunder. As usual when the Ginger Dictator deals with the Black and Gold, his punishments were both harsh and potentially very damaging. At least he’s consistent.

The first – and least – important part of Ginger’s ruling was a cool $100,000 fine for Tomlin. That may sound like big money to you or I but to a head coach making $5 million, it’s not much different than an average worker getting docked $150. As an aside, can anybody else believe that goof Tomlin gets paid five MILLION dollars to lie his ass off at press conferences and embarrass the franchise on national television? Meanwhile, a truly great head coach like Bill Cowher was sent into retirement because the team didn’t feel he was worth a top salary. Continue reading »

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Sep 272013
 


On Sunday, the Pittsburgh Steelers meet the Minnesota Vikings in London, England in what has become the NFL’s annual version of an “international friendly.” Technically, the Vikings are the home team – the team’s owner agreed to sacrifice one of their eight home games as a combination veiled threat/silent protest over their decrepit stadium – but in reality the Steelers should enjoy the majority of crowd support.

Londoners are used to cheering for Big Ben, after all.

Besides, Steeler Nation extends not only from coast to coast but around the globe. If my google analytics are to be believed, my visitors span the globe from Mexico to China and from Norway to  South Africa. Actually, if the Vikes wanted a home game, they probably should’ve played the game in Oslo. Despite the fact good seats are still available, the crowd should be a bunch of Terrible Towel waving hooligans.

Unless they’ve heard of Ryan Clark. Continue reading »

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