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Week 3 Recap: Still Winless In 2013

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During the preseason they just didn’t care. Nothing went right in week one. Last Monday, a laughable running game combined with a porous offensive line to spell doom. So whose turn would it be to crap the bed this week?

Ben Roethlisberger, come on down!

The Pittsburgh Steelers remained winless in 2013 – counting preseason – falling to the Chicago Bears 40-23 on Sunday Night Football. On the positive side, the offense finally showed some signs of life. As expected, the return of Heath Miller opened things up in both the running and passing games. Unfortunately, the Black and Gold found yet another way to lose as they’ve become seemingly allergic to success.

When did we become the Cleveland Browns?Read More »Week 3 Recap: Still Winless In 2013

Start ‘Em Or Sit ‘Em, Steelers Edition

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Since head coach Mike Tomlin doesn’t think it’s “time to press the panic button,” I don’t expect to see significant changes to the line-up when the Pittsburgh Steelers meet the Chicago Bears on Sunday Night. To paraphrase Trib columnist Dejan Kovacevic, he seems content to keep banging his head against the wall. Too bad when Tomlin was busy looking up big fancy words to use incorrectly during his press conference, he didn’t bother taking a look at the definition of insanity.

in·san·i·ty [inˈsanitē/] – doing the same thing over and over but hoping for a different result

Maybe the Steeler don’t need to push the panic button. But they for damn sure need to make some changes. Every week, fantasy football gurus do some version of a Start ‘Em, Sit ‘Em column where they list various players and describe why or why not you should start them on your team. In that spirit, I’ll list a handful of Steelers and explain why they should or shouldn’t see more playing time going forward.Read More »Start ‘Em Or Sit ‘Em, Steelers Edition

Week 2 Recap: Bungling Their Way To Victory

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“There’s a certain amount of misery with the position that we’re in. We’ll wear it. We don’t like it. We’ll wear it.” – Mike Tomlin

If the Pittsburgh Steelers 20-10 loss to the Cincinnati Bengals was an article of clothing, it’d be a pair of bowling shoes. Stinky ugly bowling shoes. Coach T was gracious about crediting Cincy for playing well during his post-game cliche-fest. All I’ll say is that if the Bengals are the class of the AFC North, then our division has quickly become the Big East of the NFL.

In my game preview, I mentioned this being the year quarterback Andy Dalton needed to take his game to the next level. The Ginger Rifle responded by playing a hideous game. Overthrows, underthrows, missing wide open receivers, Dalton did his best to keep the Steelers in the game. Unfortunately, the Black and Gold were in an even more charitable mood.Read More »Week 2 Recap: Bungling Their Way To Victory

Redman To Start Against Bengals

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Back to the Future (1985)

The Pittsburgh Steelers displayed a laughable rushing attack last Sunday against Tennessee. How do they propose to fix this problem? By starting the same guy who shat the bed last Sunday!

Yes, Isaac Redman will start at running back Monday night against the Cincinnati Bengals.

And herein lies one of the big problems with the Steelers. Nobody has talked more than I have about what a bunch of arrogant, lazy, self-serving posers they have on that team. However, nice guys don’t win football games. Talent does.Read More »Redman To Start Against Bengals

Week One Recap: As Bad As It Gets

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The Pittsburgh Steelers suffered several injuries in their 16-9 loss to the Tennessee Titans. Zoltan Mesko is not listed among the casualties. I’m sure he spent the better part of the evening icing down his foot, though. Poor Zoltan did more punting yesterday than he did all last season for the New England Patriots.

I can safely say the Black and Gold put on the worst display of offensive football I’ve seen in my thirty odd years of yinzer-hood. Worse than when they had a guy named Walter Abercrombie lining up in the backfield. Worse than when they were being quarterbacked by Bubby Brister. Worse than the glory days of Mark Malone.

Words cannot describe how inept the Steelers appeared on offense. When Ben Roethlisberger hit Jerricho Cotchery for the team’s lone touchdown with a minute and a half left in the game, I actually saw people on Twitter posting “Nice of the offense to finally show up.” That’s insane. The offense never showed up yesterday. NEVER.Read More »Week One Recap: As Bad As It Gets

Dwyer Not Among Your 2013 Pittsburgh Steelers

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I didn’t see this one coming…

And, no, I’m not talking about the Patriots cutting Tim Tebow. Can anybody believe we lost a playoff game to that guy?

The Pittsburgh Steelers were one of the first teams to cut down to 75 men. When it came time to set their final 53 man roster, though, they were one of the last. As I waited and waited on Saturday, I immediately grew suspicious. The longer it takes, the more likely it is the team is debating cutting somebody nobody thought would be cut.

Jonathan Dwyer, come on down. Don’t forget to bring your playbook with you.Read More »Dwyer Not Among Your 2013 Pittsburgh Steelers

Steelers Preseason Mercifullly Ends

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Last season, the Pittsburgh Steelers rested almost half their starters during the team’s final preseason game. Mike Tomlin made the mistake of announcing this beforehand and fans reacted accordingly. I’m sure he got a stern talking to because when you make it obvious that a game doesn’t matter, people don’t watch and more importantly they don’t show up to pay overpriced parking or buy watered down beer. So this year, Coach T kept his intentions to himself.

Not that anything different happened. Last night, the Steelers played their fourth and final preseason game. And last night, Ben Roethlisberger, Troy Polamalu, Ryan Clark, Ike Taylor, LaMarr Woodley, Brett Keisel, Antonio Brown, Emmanuel Sanders, and even backup quarterback Bruce Gradkowski all didn’t dress.

It was Scrub-a-poloza in Carolina last night as the Black and Gold went 0-fer the preseason, falling to the Panthers 25-10. Thus concludes Pittsburgh’s first winless preseason since Bill Cowher’s final season back in 2006 and only their third in nearly 50 years. Again, the worst team ever, the 0-16 Detroit Lions, went undefeated that preseason so these games are hardly an accurate predictor of the season to come. Still, it doesn’t exactly instill one with a great deal of confidence coming off a miserable 8-8 campaign.

So, what’s Tomlin’s assessment of his team pulling a Detroit this preseason?Read More »Steelers Preseason Mercifullly Ends

Jones Injury Overshadows Steelers Third Preseason Loss

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Jones Tweet

Pop Quiz: What’s worse than an NFL preseason game?

Answer: An NFL preseason game that goes into overtime.

The Pittsburgh Steelers remained O for the preseason on Saturday, falling to the Kansas City Chiefs 26-20 in overtime. Seriously, overtime? They couldn’t just agree to shake hands and call it a tie? Screw the degenerate gamblers who bet on exhibition games.

While nobody wants to go winless at anything, one ray of sunshine coming out of Saturday’s performance was that it was much improved over the first two debacles. Considering the third preseason game is a dress rehearsal for the regular season with starters playing a full half (or more), that’s obviously a really good thing. The other positive development was that the Steelers emerged from the game more or less unscathed. Read More »Jones Injury Overshadows Steelers Third Preseason Loss

What Can Go Wrong For Steelers Tonight?

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The Pittsburgh Steelers meet the Kansas City Chiefs tonight in the all-important third exhibition preseason  game.  As I did last season, I beseech you, if you’re going to the game, don’t walk under any ladders.  Steer clear of black cats.  And if you own a rabbit’s foot, by all means bring it with you. That is, if the NFL Security Overlords permit you to smuggle it in within your regulation size purse.

The third preseason game is always a mixed blessing. It’s the most watchable game because starters usually see a good half of action in preparation for the season opener. But it’s also the scariest because within that half, you’re constantly hoping and praying none of the starters get injured. In a just world, when that half is over, everybody is healthy and ready for the regular season.

Unfortunately, we don’t live in a just world.Read More »What Can Go Wrong For Steelers Tonight?