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Another Dismal Super Bowl For Steelers Fans

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I’ve watched every minute of every Super Bowl from the opening kick-off through the trophy presentation since the New York Giants crushed the Denver Broncos in Super Bowl XXI way back in 1987. Except for last year. Oh, I watched the entire game, from the embarrassing power outage all the way until the blatant pass interference that ended the San Francisco 49ers comeback bid. Immediately after that ridiculous non-call, I turned on my PS3 and set to blowing stuff up because I’d rather have a colonic with a rusty drainpipe than watch the Baltimore Ravens hoist the Lombardi Trophy.

Between the Brothers Harbaugh meeting in a battle of epic assholes to the endless stories about what a gift to humanity Stabby McStabberson Ray Lewis has been since the pesky little murder he aided and abetted ten years ago, they couldn’t have picked a worse Super Bowl for fans of the Pittsburgh Steelers.

This year’s match-up won’t be the Worst Super Bowl Ever but it’ll be damn close.Read More »Another Dismal Super Bowl For Steelers Fans

Sound-Off: Twas The Monday Night Before Christmas…

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(Editor's Note: Not Hennessy. That really is Santa, tho.)

By Hennessy

Christmas will soon be here! The time of year for cheer, happiness, good will towards men…

The time of year when you swim through hordes of over-perfumed or hygiene unfriendly shoppers to spend money on overpriced junk. Let’s not forget my favorite part of the Holiday season, the AIRING OF GRIEVANCES!!

Am I the only one who fumbled my cheer and recovered a pigskin of disappointment?

Last year, my fiancé spent hours locating and framing two poster-sized pictures for me. Be jealous. One print is of the USX Tower under construction in 1968, with my late grandfather-father almost visible as a foreman forging a symbol of the Steel City. The other is of Mike Tomlin, donning Black and Gold gortex as he guides our Pittsburgh Steelers through a playoff win en-route to a Lombardi Trophy in 2008.  My friends “watch” the Steelers with me whenever they have a national game.

Anyway, allow me to air my grievances….
Read More »Sound-Off: Twas The Monday Night Before Christmas…

Week 15 Recap: Not The Steelers Night

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You knew it wasn’t going to be the Pittsburgh Steelers night last night. When the Four Letter came back from commercial to reveal the San Francisco 49ers dilapidated old stadium was bathed in darkness, you knew it wouldn’t be our night. Chris Berman and his gaggle of idiots showing their calm level-headed journalistic skills by repeatedly comparing a blown fuse to both a catastrophic earthquake and 9/11 was almost as torturous as the 20-3 ass-kicking the Niners meted out to the Steelers. Ryan Clark later told the media he felt the blackout was orchestrated by Niners management to illustrate their need for a new stadium.

And people think Steeler fans are paranoid…

Anyway, you knew it wouldn’t be the Steelers night when they took the opening kickoff, drove right down the field, then had the drive end on a Ben Roethlisberger interception. Ben would be intercepted on the Steelers’ next drive, too. He’d add another later in the game and throw in a lost fumble for good measure. I’m not going to criticize Big Ben for playing an absolutely atrocious game (“I was the 49ers best player,” he’d later say) because 29 other quarterbacks wouldn’t have even bothered suiting up last night. He tried to tough it out when it was clear he had absolutely nothing in the tank. It doesn’t take a videotape nerd like Ron Jaworski to see Ben wasn’t stepping into throws leading to the ball sailing all over the place.
Read More »Week 15 Recap: Not The Steelers Night

Know Thy Enemy: San Francisco 49ers

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The NFL is weird. When schedules are announced over the summer, every fan looks at their team’s slate and begins to mentally check off wins and losses. Of course, it NEVER plays out as we expect. The baseball season lasts like six months, the hockey and basketball seasons last nearly as long. Football season is the shortest of the four major sports but so many twists and turns occur over sixteen games that it feels a lot longer.

When the Pittsburgh Steelers were scheduled to face the San Francisco 49ers on Monday Night Football back in August, I’m sure most members of Steeler Nation had that penciled in as an easy W. The Niners were a miserable 6-10 last year and starting a new regime under college coaching wunderkind Jim Harbaugh. The lockout prevented them from bringing in a new quarterback so they were stuck with former first overall pick Alex Smith, who looked like an epic bust. Even if the trip out to the West Coast has historically been tough, this was still a game the Steelers should win.

Fast forward four months later. The Niners are one of the surprise teams of the year, having already clinched their first NFC West title in over a decade. Harbaugh is probably going to be coach of the year. Meanwhile, the Steelers are facing them at the worst possible time. Their superstar quarterback just suffered a horrific ankle injury while their superstar linebacker is suspended for one game. Mix in the fact both teams are in a playoff scramble for seeding position and you have a recipe for disaster.
Read More »Know Thy Enemy: San Francisco 49ers

Which Harbaugh Brother Is A Bigger Dick?

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As we await word whether the NFL Appeals Committee will do the right thing by lifting the suspension of Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker James Harrison, let us turn our attention to other concerns. Namely, this week’s big game against the NFC West Champion San Francisco 49ers. When the ball is kicked off on Monday night, it will be the second time this year the Black and Gold have faced a member of the Harbaugh family. John, as we well know, is coach of the hated Baltimore Ravens. His brother, Jim, is the mastermind behind the Niners’ unexpected resurgence.

The Brothers Harbaugh have one thing in common: They’re both colossal dicks.

For weeks now, some of you may have noticed sarcastic references to “Gatorade showers” in my posts. For those not in on the joke, what I’m referring to is the Ratbirds dousing their coach with the foul-tasting sports drink after they swept the season series with the Steelers. I’ve watched football a long time and I’d be hard pressed to recall a more ridiculous post-game display. Teams that clinch their first playoff berth in decades shower their coach with Gatorade. Teams that just won the Lombardi Trophy shower their coach with Gatorade. Accomplishing the pedestrian feat of beating your division rival a whopping twice in a row does not merit such a spectacle.
Read More »Which Harbaugh Brother Is A Bigger Dick?