Mar 102015


Been awhile, huh?

With roughly an hour to go before the official start of the 2015 NFL free agency period, I figured it was about time to check in with an update on our Pittsburgh Steelers. To say our team has some work to do would be an understatement. The offense was incredible last season while the defense, well, the defense needs nearly a complete overhaul. With brand new defensive coordinator Keith Butler set to take the reins this upcoming season, it would behoove the team to give the man some actual talent to work with.

Not surprisingly, the first major moves of the off-season revolve around the D. Veteran Brett Keisel was released yesterday, all but ensuring an end to his career in Black and Gold. While Da Beard was a solid contributor last year, he was once again lost to a season ending injury as his age make counting on him for a full season impossible. Keisel wants to continue playing and I’m sure he’ll find a home either with Pittsburgh West (Arizona) or Pittsburgh South (Tennessee) as we finally move on to rebuilding the defensive line. Continue reading »

Dec 102014


As I’ve mentioned before, I spent the Thanksgiving holiday with my family down in Florida. I tried keeping up with any important news concerning the Pittsburgh Steelers but between food hangovers and travel woes, some things fell through the cracks. Most notably, I missed the news that defensive end Brett Keisel suffered a torn tricep that will officially end his 2014 season.

Well, I didn’t exactly “miss it.” I just didn’t report it here. Watching the game at a Steeler bar, as soon as I saw the Diesel walking off holding his arm I figured he tore his bicep/tricep. Meanwhile, the Steelers waited until before game time to announce James Harrison would also be sitting out with a balky knee so that one’s on them. Continue reading »

Week 7 Recap: You’ve Been Thunderstruck

 Posted by at 9:58 am  Antonio Brown, Dick LeBeau, Keisel's Beard, Le'Veon Bell, Recaps  Comments Off on Week 7 Recap: You’ve Been Thunderstruck
Oct 212014


Ron Burgundy with all the analysis you really need.

For the first quarter plus of last night’s game between the Pittsburgh Steelers and Houston Texans, things could not have been going worse for the Black and Gold. The Steelers offense got off to glacial start – punctuated by boos from the Heinz Field faithful mixing in with the raindrops from above. And our defense couldn’t get off the field, allowing Houston to drive for three straight scores on their first three possessions. By early in the second quarter, Arian Foster had already tallied nearly 100 yards rushing while our inept secondary and anemic pass rush was making Ryan Fitzpatrick look like Joe Montana.

Then come the thunder. Continue reading »

Steelers Bring Back Da Beard

 Posted by at 5:24 am  Keisel's Beard  Comments Off on Steelers Bring Back Da Beard
Aug 202014


Last year’s season finale featured what many expected to be the final appearances of Pittsburgh Steelers mainstays Ike Taylor, Brett Keisel and Troy Polamalu. It looks like the Black and Gold are getting the band back together, at least for one more year. Ike and Troy both re-upped during the off-season and yesterday the Steelers announced Da Beard while also return in 2014. Continue reading »

Week 17 Recap: Fresh Out Of Miracles

 Posted by at 5:15 am  Antonio Brown, Big Ben, Keisel's Beard, Le'Veon Bell, NFL Playoffs, Troy Polamalu  Comments Off on Week 17 Recap: Fresh Out Of Miracles
Dec 302013


The picture above is of Kansas City Chiefs kicker Ryan Succop. Or, as he’ll be forever known in the Steel City, the Most Hated Man In Pittsburgh. You have ONE JOB, assclown. Although I suppose there is some poetry to the season ending because of a spectacular special teams FAIL.

On a side note, only the Pittsburgh Steelers could get screwed over by the referees in a game they weren’t even playing. Even worse, they got jobbed TWICE. That’s some superior trolling by Roger Goodell. Bring back the replacement refs!

As you may have noticed, I have yet to talk about the Pittsburgh Steelers 20-7 victory over the Cleveland Browns. That’s because it was the epitome of a forgettable game. Yeah, the Black and Gold had to win to keep their slim playoff chances alive but there was little doubt they’d do that. Beyond the easy W, there was little of note beyond some personal statistical goals and perhaps the chance to see Steeler legends (Troy Polamalu, Bret Keisel) play their final game at Heinz Field.  Continue reading »

Week 16 Recap: Die Another Day

 Posted by at 8:03 am  Keisel's Beard, Le'Veon Bell, Mike Tomlin, NFL Playoffs, Secondary, Special Teams, Troy Polamalu  Comments Off on Week 16 Recap: Die Another Day
Dec 232013

Steelers another day

Talk about living a charmed life. In my preview for yesterday’s game between the Pittsburgh Steelers and Green Bay Packers, I ended by wondering what would happen if the Steelers’ slim playoff hopes were already extinguished by kickoff. Well, not only did every single domino fall their way in the early games, the New England Patriots did them a solid by hammering the Baltimore Ravens later in the afternoon. Yes, ladies and gentleman, the Black and Gold are still mathematically alive for the AFC Playoffs.

It’s a Christmas Miracle.

Of course, it would’ve all been moot had the Steelers not taken care of business by defeating the Packers. Their 38-31 victory was a wild affair featuring a little bit of everything: good offense, good defense, weather porn, special teams trickeration, a heart-stopping finish, and crooked referees doing their best to screw Pittsburgh over. It was the football version of a WWE wrestling match. And in the end, the good guys won. Continue reading »

Troy Polamalu Cuts Hair For Veterans

 Posted by at 11:20 am  Keisel's Beard, Troy Polamalu  Comments Off on Troy Polamalu Cuts Hair For Veterans
Nov 122013


Here’s a happy story to take a break from all the talk about whether the Pittsburgh Steelers should – or would – trade Ben Roethlisberger. Yesterday was Veteran’s Day. I’m sure many of you knew that because you didn’t have to go to work or school and instead spent the day on your computer searching for porn and not commenting on my blog. Scanning my site stats, I receive a number of hits from overseas so unless there is secretively a sect of Steeler Nation in Saudi Arabia, I can only assume some of you servicemen (and women) log in here from time to time.

Let me join others in (belatedly) thanking you for your service.

One person who went all-out for our veterans yesterday was future Hall of Fame safety Troy Polamalu. When I say “Troy,” I’m sure one of two images spring to mind. First, him launching himself with reckless abandon over the line of scrimmage. And second, his signature flowing mane that’s since become immortalized in a series of Head N’ Shoulders commercials. Continue reading »

Delusional Steelers Think They’re Still Relevant

 Posted by at 11:39 am  Antonio Brown, Big Ben, Keisel's Beard  Comments Off on Delusional Steelers Think They’re Still Relevant
Oct 292013

Pittsburgh Steelers Super Bowl XLV Media Availability

By the time you read this, Pittsburgh Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin will have held his weekly press conference. I’ll gleefully mock his idiocy tomorrow. Until then, we have others joining him in the “WTF is he talking about?” club this week.

I realize football players aren’t smart. The vast majority of them can barely write their own names. And I realize they’re taught early on some simple strategies for dealing with the media. That’s why so many of them repeat the same cliches and the same sound bites over and over again. It’s rare when you find one truly capable of actual insight. Continue reading »

Steelers Name Team Captains

 Posted by at 12:28 pm  Big Ben, Keisel's Beard, Maurkice Pouncey, Ryan Clark  Comments Off on Steelers Name Team Captains
Sep 052013

Pouncey Free Hernandez

The Pittsburgh Steelers have elected their team captains for the upcoming season. The four captains are Ben Roethlisberger, Ryan Clark, Brett Keisel, and Maurkice Pouncey. Ben and Pouncer obviously represent the offense while Clark and Keis stand for the D. The Steelers usuallly have a special teams representative but for whatever reason it appears they won’t this season. Perhaps when they play less shitty they’ll be granted a seat at the big boy table. Continue reading »

Steelers Choose Team Captains

 Posted by at 10:14 am  Big Ben, Keisel's Beard  Comments Off on Steelers Choose Team Captains
Sep 052012

The Pittsburgh Steelers chose their team captains for the 2012 season. The results are another illustration that in many ways this year is going to be a transition year for the team. Unlike in previous years when half the team wore the “C” only two players were chosen to be captains. Ben Roethlisberger and Brett Keisel.

Last year, the team had four captains, one on defense (James Farrior), one on special teams (Arnaz Battle) and two on offense (Hines Ward and Ben). Now that I think look at it, it seems kind of weird they chose one captain defense and special teams but two on offense last season. Makes you wonder if there was some political maneuverings at play there. The team famously stripped Ben of his captaincy the year following his shenanigans down in Georgia so I can see team officials “encouraging” the players to make Ben a captain even though deep down everybody knew Hines was their undisputed leader.

The selection of Diesel is also an interesting one. Farrior was clearly the defense’s leader on the field but he was never their biggest star. While he’s long gone, the stars still remain. With all due respect to the commanding presence of Keisel’s beard, one would’ve thought a mainstay like Troy Polamalu or James Harrison would’ve been named captain. I guess James is sort of a lead by example type and Troy is far too quiet to be obvious choices while guys like Lawrence Timmons or LaMarr Woodley don’t have the seniority to be named captain.

I realize I’m probably over-analyzing this since the main duty of a team captain is call heads or tails in the event a game goes into overtime. That being the case, the chief factor in picking a captain should probably be nice clear enunciation. After all, we wouldn’t want a repeat of the Jerome Bettis Thanksgiving Coin Toss incident. Although with these replacement officials handling the duties, I wouldn’t be surprised if we did.