Know Thy Enemy: Indianapolis Colts

 Posted by at 7:33 am  Game Preview, Secondary  Comments Off on Know Thy Enemy: Indianapolis Colts
Oct 242014


This could get ugly.

Real ugly.

Baltimore Raven mugshot ugly. Cleveland girl ugly. Watching Andy Dalton play ugly.

In last week’s preview, I started off by saying the Pittsburgh Steelers struggle against good quarterbacks so it’s fortunate they weren’t playing one. Despite the defense trying their best to make Ryan Fitzpatrick look like a superstar in the first half, the universe eventually corrected itself. When you live by the Fitzmagic, you die by Shitzpatrick. Anyway, point is the Steelers lucked out on Monday.

The only luck we’ll be seeing this Sunday will be Andrew Luck, superstar quarterback for the Indianapolis Colts. Continue reading »

Oct 062014

Jacksonville Jaguars Pool Pink Bikini Terrible Towel Gif

Yo,  blonde in the pink bikini, hit me up some time. I’m on twitter.

The Pittsburgh Steelers defeated the Jacksonville Jaguars 17-9 then proceeded to add insult to injury by taking over their pool. Not that many in the crowd of 70,000 were offended considering a solid two thirds of them were Steeler fans anyway. There are a lot of terrible fan bases in the NFL but none scrape the bottom of the barrel quite as badly as Jacksonville. We’re five games into the season and other than week two at Baltimore, I don’t think the Black and Gold have played an actual road game yet.

Where to start with yesterday’s performance… Continue reading »

Sep 292014


Well, I hate to say I told you so…

But I did tell you so.

In the least surprising “major upset” ever, the winless Tampa Bay Buccaneers left Heinz Field with their first victory of the season, scoring a last second go-ahead touchdown to upend the Pittsburgh Steelers 27-24. While I’m not shocked the Steelers lost, I am embarrassed by exactly how they lost. I have never seen a more sloppy and undisciplined Steeler team. They’ve become a Black and Gold disgrace.

And it all starts with Mike Tomlin. Continue reading »

Sep 252014


The Pittsburgh Steelers put together their finest performance of the past two seasons last Sunday night against the Carolina Panthers. It may have been a costly victory, however. Three defensive starters went down with injury, at least two of whom are expected to miss significant time. The question therefore becomes how the Steelers fill those holes.

In my game recap, I tossed in a line about not being so sure the back-ups are a steep downgrade from the starters. Generally speaking, I still believe that. Jarvis Jones and Ryan Shazier might be great some day but that day is definitely not here. With Shazier, you can forgive his lapses because being a rookie playing in Dick LeBeau‘s notoriously complex defense has to be like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube blindfolded. Jones, on the other hand, is in his second season and despite seeing significant playing time last year, really hasn’t shown much of anything yet in terms of being an elite pass rusher. Continue reading »

Why Do The Steelers Waste Money On Bums?

 Posted by at 4:08 am  Kevin Colbert, Mike Tomlin, Offensive Line, Secondary  Comments Off on Why Do The Steelers Waste Money On Bums?
Sep 182014

Ben Roethlisberger, Domata Peko, Marcus Gilbert

Tuesday was Pittsburgh Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin‘s press conference. I talked a bit about the nonsense that tends to come out of Coach T’s mouth yesterday. One thing I neglected to mention was an entire line of questioning from the local media cheerleaders/reporters regarding whether a benching might be in order for right tackle Marcus Gilbert. Gilbert, it should be noted, has already surrendered four sacks through the first two games.

For his part, Tomlin said he has nothing but faith in Gilbert, even likening him to movie icon Rocky Balboa.

I’m not going to get into the whole issue of whether Gilbert should start or sit. I did that last year and it took five weeks and four losses before Tomlin decided that maybe it was time to tweak the line-up. Gilbert’s going to play and play and play some more until (unless) he proves to be a total liability. What I’m interested in is the reason the Steelers will afford Gilbert all this leeway. Continue reading »

Steelers Sign New Starting Safety

 Posted by at 5:47 am  Ryan Clark, Secondary  Comments Off on Steelers Sign New Starting Safety
Mar 122014


Ryan Clark spent last season auditioning for a job at ESPN. As Chuck Noll would say, it appears to be time for him to get on with his life’s work. The Pittsburgh Steelers have already found his replacement.

Mike Mitchell of the Carolina Panthers became the Steelers first significant free agent signing in nearly ten years. By “significant” I mean rather than their usual method of dumpster diving for back-ups and role players, Mitchell represents a first day signee who will be expected to start. Not only start but be an upgrade for a defense that has fallen off considerably the past couple seasons. Why else would they give him 5 years at $25 million ($10 million guaranteed)? Continue reading »

Week 16 Recap: Die Another Day

 Posted by at 8:03 am  Keisel's Beard, Le'Veon Bell, Mike Tomlin, NFL Playoffs, Secondary, Special Teams, Troy Polamalu  Comments Off on Week 16 Recap: Die Another Day
Dec 232013

Steelers another day

Talk about living a charmed life. In my preview for yesterday’s game between the Pittsburgh Steelers and Green Bay Packers, I ended by wondering what would happen if the Steelers’ slim playoff hopes were already extinguished by kickoff. Well, not only did every single domino fall their way in the early games, the New England Patriots did them a solid by hammering the Baltimore Ravens later in the afternoon. Yes, ladies and gentleman, the Black and Gold are still mathematically alive for the AFC Playoffs.

It’s a Christmas Miracle.

Of course, it would’ve all been moot had the Steelers not taken care of business by defeating the Packers. Their 38-31 victory was a wild affair featuring a little bit of everything: good offense, good defense, weather porn, special teams trickeration, a heart-stopping finish, and crooked referees doing their best to screw Pittsburgh over. It was the football version of a WWE wrestling match. And in the end, the good guys won. Continue reading »

Dec 102013


I made the mistake of tuning into the Monday Night Football countdown show last night. Usually I do my best to avoid Stabby McStabberson and the rest of the merry pranksters who populate the Four Letter. However, I happened to tune in just in time to hear them discuss the Pittsburgh Steelers season ending loss to the Miami Dolphins. As usual, they only bother discussing the Black and Gold when they have something negative to say.

Anyway, what surprised me was the focus of their discussion. I expected them to touch on Ben Roethlisberger‘s seething hatred of Todd Haley – which was evidently on full display in the locker room after the game – and they did mention it. However, what I didn’t expect was much of their discussion focusing on Pro Bowl safety and future Hall of Famer Troy Polamalu. The goofs on the panel placed a great deal of the blame for the defeat on Troy, even speculating this may be his final season in Pittsburgh.

Which at first seemed absurd but after thinking it over, is this the end of the line for Troy Polamalu? Continue reading »

Woodley Set To Return…But Should He?

 Posted by at 5:27 am  Defensive Line, LaMarr Woodley, Offensive Line, Secondary  Comments Off on Woodley Set To Return…But Should He?
Nov 262013


The Pittsburgh Steelers have managed to claw their way back into the AFC playoff discussion. As I mentioned in yesterday’s game recap, a large part of their resurgence is due to recent line-up changes. A few of those changes were coach Mike Tomlin demoting guys due to poor performance but most of them came about because of  injuries. In nearly every instance where a starter has gone down, his replacement has come in and been an improvement.

Baseball has what is called a Lou Gehrig situation. Basically, Gehrig was a bench warmer until one fateful day when the starter was ill and couldn’t play. Gehrig took his place and performed so well he’d play every game thereafter for the next fourteen years. It’s a tremendous achievement but also a cautionary tale about how quickly and unexpectedly a player can find themselves replaced. Continue reading »

Know Thy Enemy: Minnesota Vikings

 Posted by at 12:16 pm  Game Preview, Linebackers, Running Backs, Secondary  Comments Off on Know Thy Enemy: Minnesota Vikings
Sep 272013

steelers standing

There’s a sight rarer than Todd Haley’s El Camino Comet, the Blood Moon, and a solar eclipse all rolled into one. Yes, the Cleveland Browns can say they are ahead of the Pittsburgh Steelers in the standings. In a bit of scheduled irony, the Browns’ victim last Sunday is this week’s opponent for the Black and Gold. Let’s hope for a similar result because I really don’t think I could live with losing to a team that lost to Cleveland.

The Minnesota Vikings are not a particularly good team. Then again, neither are the Steelers since we’re both 0-3. Complicating matters is the game will be played at Wembley Stadium in London, England. Minny has been overseas since Tuesday while Mike Tomlin and crew decided to hop a red-eye last night in order to arrive in London on Friday morning (their time). Hopefully, this is one strategy which pays off. Continue reading »